My Depressing Glass of Water

Water. The most precious ingredient in the the cycle of life. This wonderful clear substance makes life, keeps life, and regenerates life.
We need to keep the water happy. WATER, should never be mad. what if, someday, water decides to up and LEAVE?? what would happen?? well, after everything died, nothing, but untill THEN, oh man.
The water has the POWER!
It CONTROLS us, man!
...i wonder if the water knows...
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is the water smart?
has it realised what's goin' on?
or, is it waiting. yes, is it WAITING??? does the water have an AGENDA?!??! a timetable? do we need to FEAR the WATER?!!?
"RUN! RUN FROM THE WATER!"
we have angered it. insulted the water with our, with our "flavour crystals" and instant coffee.

WHY did we HAVE to DO this???
AAAAARRRGH!! I FEEL THE WATER'S PAIN!!!
i am sympathetic for the water.
please forgive me water! oh hear me water!
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don't hate me. water. please... love me.
i love YOU water. more than you will ever know or realize.
I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU WATER!!!! i just can't. i can't do it.
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can we still be friends? will you spend time with me? maybe have dinner sometime. you could be right there with me. at the same table as me.
hey water, hey... remember that time? y'know, heh, that TIME??
oh, you don't.
YOU ARE SO INSENSITIVE, WATER!!
i don't think we CAN be friends.
I HATE YOU!!
I HATE YOU, WATER!
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don't cry. please don't cry, water. i hate it when you cry.
no nooo, of course you're better than carbonated soda beverages. yeess, there there. aawww. i know. tell daddy, that's right. let it out. aww.
ya i mean it. you ARE the best, water.
yes. the best.